Wiping is a scam.
the greeks had gods. we have a knob.
ASSJET is a bidet attachment. One knob. No plug. It goes under the toilet seat you already have, and your butt will send a thank-you card. Not on sale yet, so get on the list.
One knob. That's it.
Turn it, water comes out. Turn it back, it stops. No plug, no batteries, no plumber: five minutes and a wrench. Cold water only, with a brass valve and a steel hose, because leaks are the one thing that isn't funny.
Which bathroom god are you?
Eight questions. Six Greek gods. One of them is Hades. Sorry.
Swear off dry paper.
The Butt Oath
I swear to stop
just moving it around.
Questions you're thinking.
Is this real?
Yep. A real bidet from a real factory. We test the first batch before you get one.
Will it fit my toilet?
Almost every normal toilet. Weird toilet? We'll tell you before you pay.
Do I need a plumber?
No. A wrench, five minutes, cold water. That's the whole job.
How much?
Soon. The list finds out first.