Who runs ASSJET

ASSJET is a brand of Larkfield Works, a small California company. We are product designers and engineers. Everyone has a joke about toilet paper. We made the fix easy: a bidet attachment with one knob and no plug.

Reach us

Ask on our help page. We answer within 1 business day. Postal address: 1155 4th St, San Francisco, CA 94158. Our email always comes from the ASSJET name; we never ask for a card or password by email.

The product

Made by a specialist bidet factory in Xiamen, China. Before anything goes on sale we test the real unit ourselves and publish what we saw, including the install, on the product page.

Payments

Not live yet. When they are, card payments run on Stripe and we never see your card number.

The jokes

The name is the joke. The jokes are on toilet paper, not on you. We never make health claims and we never fake a review, a customer or a count.